What is the level of honor that you give to your parents? -high, medium, or low?
What the Bible says about honoring our parents:
Exodus 20:12, Regard (treat with honor, due obedience, and courtesy) your father and mother, that your days may be long in the land the Lord your God gives you.
Exodus 21:17, whoever was guilty of cursing his parents would be put to death! This word simply means to lightly esteem.
Ephesians 6:1-3, Children, obey your parents in the Lord [as His representatives], for this is just and right. Honor (esteem and value as precious) your father and your mother--this is the first commandment with a promise--That all may be well with you and that you may live long on the earth.
Romans 13:1b-2a, For there is no authority except from God [by His permission, His sanction], and those that exist do so by God's appointment. Therefore he who resists and sets himself up against the authorities resists what God has appointed and arranged [in divine order].
Colossians 3:20, Children, obey your parents in everything, for this is pleasing to the Lord.
2 Timothy 3 gives a description of people in the last days, including- lovers of self, utterly self-centered, disobedient to parents and ungrateful.
Proverbs 30:17 gives a strong warning to those who despise their parents: you’ll lose all spiritual discernment! The eye that mocks a father and scorns to obey a mother, the ravens of the valley will pick it out, and the young vultures will devour it.
we should make it our aim to bring our parents joy! Proverbs 23:24-26, The father of the [uncompromisingly] righteous (the upright, in right standing with God) shall greatly rejoice, and he who becomes the father of a wise child shall have joy in him. Let your father and your mother be glad, and let her who bore you rejoice. My son, give me your heart and let your eyes observe and delight in my ways...
Real Life Family Situations
Issue: lack of manners
So, I’m sitting at the dinner table, enjoying my spaghetti, when I hear someone (we won’t mention names), who’s making all sorts of detestable noises as he’s eating! smacking, slurping -- ah! I’m disgusted!
Response: how do you respond to irritations? Instead of complaining, sighing, or poking fun at them, just let it go. God loves laughter, but not at the expense of others. Be grateful you even have that person in your life. Use it as a reminder for you to not offend in your manners. God wants to love others through you. Phil.2:3 1 Cor. 13:5, It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God's love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].
Issue: a decision you don’t agree with
I won’t get into the details, but sometimes my parents do things that I just don’t think is right... like, maybe a Christian shouldn’t be doing that.
Response: sometimes you need to step back and remember that God sees the bigger picture. He is the Potter. He is in control. Take the situation to Him in prayer. If appropriate, make an appeal to your parents (Esther- wise and gracious in making appeals - she didn’t despise Mordecai and his plan for her to go before the king). Entrust yourself to God (1 Peter 2:23, 3:9, 4:19).
Issue: Wayward sibling that’s made poor choices in life
I have a friend whose brother ran away from home. He’s way over his head in sin. Things aren’t looking good. It’s causing so much stress on them. What do I tell my friend?
Response: Ask God to bless them with the qualities they are lacking. Pray!!! Leave the results in God’s hands and have HOPE that He can do the changing in someone else! Phil. 1:6, Matt. 5:44 (love them, pray for them). Romans 12:10, Love one another with brotherly affection [as members of one family], giving precedence and showing honor to one another. never quit reaching out to them, or loving them.
Issue: What to do when your parents don’t have a peace about something
We went clothes shopping the other day. I saw the cutest outfit! It fit perfectly, and it was even on sale! But Mom said no. I’m so disappointed. Doesn’t she care?
Response: God’s placed your parents over you as a protection from unseen dangers (maybe it wasn’t modest -what you advertise for is what you will get-, maybe the material was such that it would shrink, etc.). He can provide something even better, if, in fact, you need it. Don’t put all your happiness on temporal things! Trust and obey. Matthew 6:32, your heavenly Father knows well that you need them all. Romans 12:18, If possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Welcome their correction. Don’t feed the lies (that she doesn’t care).
Issue: Complying outwardly, but still struggling inside (don’t feel submissive)
I was asked to help outside with yard work. It was hot, I still had things that I had planned to do... but I went and helped anyway. I wanted to be obedient in helping out, but my heart sure wasn’t happy. What’s wrong with me?
Response: don’t let your feelings dictate your obedience. 1 Thessalonians 5:18, in everything give thanks. Do all as unto Jesus! -Col. 3:23. Ask God to help you obey, and trust Him to change your feelings. Romans 12:16, Live in harmony with one another; do not be haughty (snobbish, high-minded, exclusive), but readily adjust yourself to [people, things] and give yourselves to humble tasks. Never overestimate yourself or be wise in your own conceits. Learn to honor your parents’ spoken and unspoken wishes.
Issue: being told something that I didn’t want to hear
So I’m sitting at the computer, deep in work and being productive, when Dad walks in the room. He seemed to pause, and I could tell he was looking at me. Then he said - “you need to watch your posture... you’re all humped over!” Why does he always have to tell me what to do?
Response: God doesn’t waste your parents on you. He chose just the right ones for you, and He has a bigger plan. Say no to self, and to self-pity! Your dad has the right to instruct! He wants the best for you. Accept it graciously and gratefully. 1 Peter 3:9, Never return evil for evil or insult for insult (scolding, tongue-lashing, berating), but on the contrary blessing [praying for their welfare, happiness, and protection, and truly pitying and loving them]. For know that to this you have been called, that you may yourselves inherit a blessing [from God--that you may obtain a blessing as heirs, bringing welfare and happiness and protection].
Issue: telling your story to those not involved
Mom woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning... if you know what I mean. Everything I did was wrong. Correction, correction, correction - all day! Yes, I know I have room for improvement, but it’s not like I was trying to do things wrong. I spilled it all out to my sister. Now I feel so much better. At least she’s on my side.
Response: Seek peace! Think the best of others (Philippians 2). Only go to those directly involved. Learn to guard your tongue! Murmuring: telling others about a situation that displeases you. It infects them with the same negative response. Numbers 14:27-28, Ps. 106: 24-27, 1 Cor. 10:10-12, Ex. 16:8b.
Matthew 25:45, in so far as you failed to do it for the least [in the estimation of men] of these, you failed to do it for Me.
Read the story from Stay in the Castle (by, Pastor Jerry Ross- we are not familiar with all his publications, but this little booklet is recommended!) discuss: right now is your time of preparation. You are not guaranteed tomorrow. Live TODAY to its fullest for Jesus. Your “dream life” is right now. Choices always have consequences. Satan wants us to make rash choices, and he blinds us to the consequences. Stop, ponder, pray! The decisions you make today will affect your future - for good, and for bad. Gal. 6 - the laws of sowing and reaping (you reap what you sow, in a different season than you sow, more than you sow, etc.). Wake up each morning, choosing to follow the Lord (Joshua 24:15). Let God be God. Leave the results of your obedience up to Him.
Also, simple ways of showing respect: saying "sir" and "ma'am" introduce your parents to your friends, desire to spend time with your parents, sit with your parents in church, value their counsel, show honor to God by showing honor to them, include them in your decisions. Honor: give them value and worth! The question is- do you TRUST GOD? in all areas of your life??
Evaluation Questions to Prayerfully Ponder from StoryTime with Gina:
Supporting Scripture: James 3; Isaiah 53:7
What hardships in your life are perhaps blessings in disguise?
What comes from your mouth in response to those around you?
What do your responses and words reveal about your heart?
Do your words reflect the image and likeness of your Heavenly Father?
Do you share words of life with those around you unconditionally, without
strings attached?
Is there anyone in your life that you should prayerfully pursue in an attempt
to make things right?
Are you hiding God’s word in your heart? (See Psalm 119:10-12)
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